-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] made a new channel: #F1ND1NGS --
-- tentacleTherapist [TT] changed a channel name. --
-- #F1ND1NGS -> #findings --
TT: Right, so in my wandering the desert, I've found some pretty neat locations.
GA: I See
TT: There's a handful of places that seem interesting enough - there's a museum of natural history that might be worth exploring.
TG: oh are we just posting places to explore in here
TG: cause i got one
TG: i wanna check out nara dreamland
TT: Would there still be remains of it?
TT: It's not unlikely. Roller coasters are made to survive some intense play on them.
TT: But would they still work, is my question.
TT: Probably not.
TG: thats fine im more into the landscaping anyway
EB: i've never even heard of this place, dave.
TG: it was going to be a disneyland
EB: okay. so what makes it better than like, a real disney land?
TG: im getting to it jeez
TG: its like weve never spoken
TG: yes i am breaking my text up across 5 messages
TG: you should be used to this by now
TG: anyway it got debranded mid-construction so it just
TG: stopped being a disneyland thing
TG: and kinda became its own thing about a third of the way in
TG: theres an entire area for some old tokusatsu shows
TG: ultraman and shit
TG: it seems sick as hell
TT: I didn't know you liked those.
TG: i used to
TG: but theyre camp enough as is its hard to be ironic about them
TG: its like parodying borat
TT: Timely reference.
EB: very nice.
TG: thank you john
EB: any time.
TG: oh fuck i wanna go to didney worl
GG: disney world!!!
TG: we can go to disney world too i GUESS
TT: Disneyworld is a pretty solid pick.
TT: Don't amusement parks work through like... people running them?
TT: Staff, costumed mascots, et cetera.
TG: it cant be that hard to figure out though
TG: they hired minimum wage people for it all the time
TT: I don't think minimum wage is a good indicator of skill as much as it is wage theft.
TG: okay marx
TG: youre right but okay marx
TT: I'm simply illuminating the facts.
TG: yeah whatever youre RIGHT im just saying it cant be that hard
GG: I've always wanted to ruin someone's Splash Mountain photo...
GG: theres also audio animatronics to study! :o
GG: i want to find my boy. buzzy.
GG: he's from an old show
GG: it closed in 2007 but maybe... there's still a chance. :(
TT: There's the chance that he's been rusted to shit... it has been quite a while.
GG: i don't want to think about that! i want to see my boy.
TT: Have you ever been to Disneyworld to begin with, Jade?
GG: no but i had internet access silly!
GG: and what else is there to do other than watch shitty home videos of the cranium command show?
TT: Fair enough.
TG: weve lost sight of the original goal i think
TG: im gonna go to nara dreamland eventually join me or dont
TG: itll probably be serene and bittersweet
TG: as we like
TG: mourn the loss of humanity
TG: humanity that once stood powerful enough to make an ultraman theme park zone
TG: but disneyworld sounds fun too i guess
TT: I'm with you. As much of a combat challenge as Disneyworld would be, the failures seem a lot more worthwhile to do an autopsy on than what we thought the successes were.
TT: Even though by the time I got a chance to learn about them, they were anything but a success.
TG: deadass did not understand why yall want to go to disneyworld b4 rememberin only dirk and i made it to the future
GG: Did the Batterwitch get her claws in Disney?
TG: thats the thing
TT: That's not a whole truth, more of a half-truth than anything.
TG: more of a half-truth bluh
TG: do u HEAR yourself talk
TT: I do, yes. I quadruple-read every message before sending.
TG: fuckin LOL
TT: Do you still want to have the reins on this history lesson?
TG: you do it itll be way funnier
TT: Her pull was strong and intense, more gravitational than anything, like a pit so deep that the ground shifted and became unlevel beneath it.
TT: Those without a firm traction on the ground could easily fall into that hole, willing or not.
TT: But it's not entirely true to say that it was her entire existence that made it possible for Earth to decline so quickly.
TT: The truth is, Disney didn't actually cow-tow to the Batterwitch when she took over. They had enough power to stand on their own.
TT: But they weren't rebelling - it's more accurate to say that they existed in tandem with the Batterwitch's control.
TT: On one hand, you have the airwaves full of Her Imperious Condescension's brutal drive to revive the downright Spartan Alternian culture.
TT: On the other, you have the airwaves pumped full of this idyllic, nostalgic, household name, pumping in sedatives.
TT: By 2030 they owned so many production studios, so many sources for film, television, music, video games, just about everything, that there only became audiences for Disney.
TT: If an idea popped up and they didn't like it, because it conflicted with their brand identity, they'd quickly produce a film, quashing that idea.
TT: They tried long and hard with people being gay until they figured out they couldn't do anything about it, after about 100 years.
TT: So they'd wallpaper around it.
TT: Jane, you liked Beauty and the Beast, right?
GG: I'd be lying if I said no?
GG: Even if the human Beast is as charismatic as white bread.
TT: They eventually retconned it so that LaFou was a gay man.
GG: I don't remember LaFou.
TT: Gaston's henchman.
GG: ... What.
TT: The hype man for the G-man himself.
GG: No, no, I remember who you're talking about now. Just... what??
TG: LOL i forgot about that one
TG: fuckin la fou
TG: what a crock of shit
TG: lmfao the fuck up guy?
TG: that guy
TG: the guy who is a comical joke character
TG: howd they fuckin do that
TG: did they make gaston gay too
TG: that dude is definitely trade at the very least
TG: nobody tops gaston and nobody tops like gaston
TG: because thatd be gay
TT: Disney'd never make a gay-coded villain. Ever.
TT: It's quite humorous that it's laFou though.
TT: Not Lumiere and Cogsworth, hm? Too close to home?
TT: Obviously not, Cogsworth loathes his wife, as all good men should.
TT: We've got to fucking do something about straight people.
GG: straight people are extinct arent they??
GG: unless youre trying to convince me the mayor and miss mail lady were in love the whole time
CG: DID YOU NOT IMMEDIATELY PEG THE FIGHT BETWEEN JACK AND THE PEREGRINE MENDICANT AS PITCH-INCLINED?
GC: W3LL 1F 1 D1DNT W3 C4NT R34LLY 3XP3CT HUM4NS TO 31TH3R
GA: Yes I Simply Assumed They Were Fated Platonic Rivals
CG: COME THE FUCK ON AND BE REALISTIC.
TT: Straight people were not a thing I was expecting to find, all things considered.
GA: Truly We Have Met An Unexpected Foe